Reply to a Friend who is in need of a kiss

21 May 2012 12 Comments

by JackieB in Journal Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Dear Friend,

You asked me if I knew how to kiss, as if I could give you a demo or a free taste.

Do lovers hold hands?

Do they embrace?

How often?

How long?

Questions of a girl who has never exchanged glances with a guy or has exchanged sweet nothings.

If you have fallen in love with so many men, then you haven’t loved at all. And the pain you get from unrequited love as what you claim is nothing more but fleeting passion that has not been received like a die-hard fan ignored by her celebrity crush. It is not even as painful as one gets from a letter with no response.

Girls often envy those who have relationship status. They think those girls who have been touched and been kissed are lucky. But in truth you are lucky.

 Why?

Because your heart is still a one whole piece. Some who have been there don’t have scars in their hearts but holes. Scars are better than holes. For when a scar is born, it means it stops bleeding. But if it is still a hole, an open wound, it bleeds continuously.

You said you wished you had romantic moments to look back. Why wish for dying memories? It’s tragic to look back and exciting to look forward. And those who have been there are not really as excited as you will be.

You feel bad because no one said, “I love you.” It will always be magical to hear those words but it feels worse when someone said “I love you.” Then, “Goodbye.”

I hope one day you’ll find your Mr. Right who will laugh with you and will laugh at you. And of course with your wicked smile, you will laugh at him too. If you watch a chick flick together, he will watch your useless tears more than the movie itself.

Yes, love hurts. And I am not exaggerating that. We always say there are many fish in the sea and stars in the sky but we know we are lying. A dynamite can kill a school of fish and stars have life span too. See statistics.

I know no man is irreplaceable as what you and Beyonce said. But Katy Perry told me each of us is original, cannot be replaced.

You don’t believe in forever. Sure, you don’t. But when you experience something beautiful you will believe not only in forever, but in everything.

So, take the advice of John Carter: ”Find a cause. Fall in love. Write a book.” I am not bitter and selfish when I say, “Everyone deserves a broken heart.” Trust me, it’s for your own good.

If you come to me crying, I know those tears are not for a man but tears for true love, tears coming from a woman who has loved genuinely and selflessly. And that’s when you know love.

Larsson’s Story: Better read than seen

09 May 2012 8 Comments

by JackieB in Arts and Entertainment, Film, Lit Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Am I too late to be obsessed with The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo?

Is there anybody out there still interested to listen about The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo?

Whatever.

I am experiencing Larsson’s fever. To cure such fever, I need to write all my thoughts to my heart’s content about the story that had been part of my summer. They say when you’re done reading a book, it’s like losing a friend. Like losing a loved one, it is hard to move on, especially when you think about Larsson gone forever. You need to talk about it all over again just to lessen the burden of losing someone.

Probably by now, you must have watched the film adaptation of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. If you haven’t, read the book first.

I highly recommend to read the book first before you watched the movie. For one reason, you will not have any feelings towards the film. You will not feel betrayed if the movie does not meet your expectation. Or, you will not learn to like it, the way people who have read the book first. You’ll just feel neutral. Why?

First, if you are not listening carefully to the dialogues of the characters, you might get lost in the story. The book is heavy in dialogue, same with the movie. It’s about digging facts. This means if you are not paying much attention to some boring movie scenes like Salander browsing her computer or Blomkvist browsing the pictures, you might not be able to understand the story.

Second, it is not as thrilling as the book. When you read a mystery novel, you end up saying, “I knew it! ” or you might say,” I should have known.” Because a 158-minute film cannot include everything found on the book, it does not mentally torture you with a number of motives, prospects, or evidence. You don’t feel like guessing at all.

Third, the film adaptation does not tell you much of how deep the partnership of Blomkvist and Salander is. Blomkvist and Salander spend a lot of time together in the book. They have long walks. They sit in the garden. They have coffee and sandwich. It is quite understandable that any director will choose to leave these details out. But these little moments in the book can make you feel that you’ve known Blomkvist and Salander for a long time.

Fourth, you will not get to know Salander and Blomkvist, the way readers do. You cannot read the characters’ thoughts in film. The movie cannot make the audience fully realize that Lisbeth Salander has a heart too (though Rooney Mara played the role well). The film adaptation does not  show scenes of  Salander and her mother which I think  is an important part of Salander’s history.

But…

I am not saying the movie is no good at all. I am happy that David Fincher tried to be  faithful to the book. I saw some parts of the first film adaptation of The Girl with Dragon Tattoo, the Swedish version. By comparison, I can say that the Hollywood version fits more to my imagination. Most of the lines were taken from the book. David Fincher kept some scenes disturbing as they were in the book. Fincher was as highly detailed  in making the film as Larsson was as highly detailed in writing his novel. He was unforgiving in brutally showing the biggest moment in the trilogy of Larsson. I had to close my eyes.

The lead actors were perfect for their roles. Daniel Craig looked stern and attractive. That’s how Mikael Blomkvist should be! Rooney Mara is such a pretty lady. But she was uglified in the movie. Did you know she need to get drunk to internalize her role as Lisbeth Salander? For someone who had not been drinking,  it was  very convincing to see her with psychological problems. Her voice also fits to Larsson’s description of  Salander’s voice, as someone who sounds like a sandpaper.  Also, she had a Swedish accent. She had an expressionless face in the entire movie which I must say, that is so Lisbeth. My only problem with Rooney is her height. Lisbeth Salander is 4’11 tall but Rooney Mara  is 5’6 tall. David Fincher said he could not  find someone who was as short as Lisbeth Salander. Oh Fincher, you should have  visited the Philippines!  LOL

What the novels lacks, the movie can provide. David Fincher captures artistic shots of Sweden. The sounds amplified the tension. You can see how gloomy Vanger’s  mansion is. The winter atmosphere made the film darker. You can almost shiver as you enter the gates of Vanger’s home. For a story that does not require a lot of action scenes, the cast and production manage to make the story visually entertaining.

Watch the movie…..

But for your own sake, read the book first.

Millennium

25 Apr 2012 19 Comments

by JackieB in Arts and Entertainment, Lit Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Believe it or not, it’s my first time to consciously spell the word millennium with double “l” and double “n.” Believe it or not, I finished the Millennium trilogy in a span of nineteen days. I spent nine days for the first book, one evening and one day for the second book, three days for the last book. If I read the trilogy straight, I can finish it within two weeks.

I am a slow reader. Oftentimes, I read and pause then resume reading. With Stieg Larsson’s novel, it was hard  to stop reading. I felt like I would miss a lot of events if I took a pause. My heart was pounding as I turned each page.

I read the Millennium trilogy like a mad man. I was exhausted after reading the novels  that I had to gather myself to write this post. I was sleep-deprived and eating was my least priority. Each novel contains around 700 pages.  It was not only the length that made me tired, the issues raised and the images were nerve-wracking. I suffered when Lisbeth Salander suffered. I fought with Mikael Blomkvist when she needed justice. On one occasion I was reading a novel when someone called out my name outside my window.  I screamed out loud.  I came back to my senses. The person knocking on my door was no murderer or any villainous character from the book.

Like a Last Song Syndrome,  the story flashes back on my head every now and then. I can write three more blog posts about the trilogy. My blog posts would be Lisbeth Salander and I,  The Women in Larsson’s novels, and Millennium: Movie Versus Book. (But they would sound redundant)

I really want to discuss further the intricacies of the  trilogy. But I cannot do that without giving spoilers.  Hence, I  will not spill  the beans.  Let this review be superficial that cannot be sufficient enough to describe the actual experience in reading the novels  or  to commend a great storyteller.

All his books have complex plots. They have subplots in between. Within a novel, there are like two mysteries or more to unlock.  It is action-packed. For every chapter, you will discover something new or something distracting.

More than anything, it touches violence against women. On The Girl who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest, Larsson included some facts about women in the military and domestic violence. You can say that Larsson is a feminist. Interviews from the press stated that Lisbeth Salander is a modern day feminist. But  I will not agree that reading the Millennium series  is enjoyable  for feminists. I would love to see men who hate women get punished but I would not be happy to know a man with principles sleeps with every woman he meets.

If there’s one word to describe Larsson and his works , it is “intelligent.” We always assume that a person who can make a published novel is intelligent. But Larsson is way beyond that. He weaves a story like no other. His brain is big enough to accommodate all these interconnections between national security, espionage, government, women, and simple crimes. He can teach you how to hack, how to  make false identity and the basics of self-defense.

Aside from the mysteries, Larsson  describes  friendship and trust in odd circumstances.  You’ll probably not find romance or love in the series. But you’ll find a special kind of partnership, friendship.

In his novels, there is no black and white and evil perhaps may be permissible. Lisbeth Salander has a different moral code. You question  how you define justice. Do you let the authorities deliver justice?  Or is it more fulfilling to take the role of God and punish those who need to pay?

By the end of the book, you ponder upon the ideas behind the story. Lisbeth  Salander is a product of dysfunctional system in the society. You wonder how many  Lisbeths are there in the world who are wrongfully judged and mistreated.

Just a short preview on what it’s like reading each book

The Girl with The Dragon Tattoo

Let me begin by saying that it is the best book among the three though I love the three books equally. For one reason, this book can stand alone.  As what I said, it has everything: violence, sex, rape, ethics, morality and corruption. This is the time you can decide if you want to read the next book or be satisfied with this. If you don’t like the first book, I doubt if you will like the second or the third.

This is time when you change your perception of  ideal fictional heroes as you meet  investigative journalist Mikael Blomkvist and legally incompetent  researcher Lisbeth Salander.  I happen to like them a lot that I cannot let go of  Lisbeth and Mikael.  I have developed some close attachment in these characters. This has driven me to read the next book, The Girl who Played with Fire

The Girl who Played with Fire

This is the most unsatisfying book among the three that you are compelled to read the last book. There are so many holes to be filled yet it is the thickest among the three. I think Larsson purposely left the holes for the readers to look forward for his third book. I felt like Larsson could have used more of his lesser-known characters in this book. It has the same themes with The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo but this time politics is involved. Less sex but filled with violence  which was unbearable to imagine (yet  I managed to read through them). My favorite scene is how Lisbeth Salander survived in a life-threatening situation.

The Girl who Kicked the Hornet’s nest

This book is about conspiracy. At this point,  justice is achieved. Mikael Blomkvist becomes the hero of the book. The common complaints I hear from people who read The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo are: there are too many names. It’s confusing and makes you dizzy. Well, brace yourself! The Girl who Kicked the Hornet’s Nest has more names and is the most confusing of all. There are so many connections that are difficult to trace. He also incorporated some real facts such as  the past Swedish prime ministers.

There are rumors that Larsson wrote the fourth book. Though the third book ended well, there can be a lot of possibilities on what can happen next to the protagonists. With a journalist as your main character, he can always be in search for exposé. With a very introvert and secretive character, there will always be excitement to see changes in her life.  I also find some of the secondary characters promising to be featured in future novels.

I arrive at the saddest of moment of a reading experience. It is knowing that you  have nothing  to look forward from the author.  They say he left his fourth book unfinished and he had the intention of having ten books in Millennium series. They say his long-time partner might continue his series or some new writer has to finish. But I feel cheated if another writer  will continue his series. I believe before he started writing, he had already prophesied the fate of Millennium. No one knows about Mikael and Lisbeth more than the author.

Stieg Larsson, please come back to life. You have an unfinished business.  I wish you have lived long enough, the way your characters have lived.

Tattoo Addiction

10 Apr 2012 13 Comments

by JackieB in Arts and Entertainment, Lit Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I thought I had enough of suspense thriller but I was wrong.

After having book and clothing shopping abstinence for two months, I decided to pay a visit in National Book Store. I had a book in mind but I made a split-second decision by picking The Girl with the  Dragon Tattoo. The book cover spoke to me it was a “sexy thriller. ” And without having second thoughts, I took my cash out and consoled myself it was cheaper than the protein shake I had in Manila Peninsula.

At first, I did not plan to read the book because I was intimidated by its length. Plus, it had too many names, and some said it was just “fairly good”. I was expecting to finish reading the book within a month but lo, and behold, I finished the book within nine days. It was definitely a page-turner that I could not put the book down. I was rapidly flipping the pages as if I were a bank robber in a hurry to steal and escape.

Just a short preview: The story revolves around the two characters. Mikael Blomkvist, is a financial journalist who is facing libel charges. Lisbeth Salander is a highly skillful researcher who is considered mentally incompetent. They are tasked to solve a murder case dated forty years ago. The event of discovering the truth behind the murder leads them to discover more secrets.

Reading The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is like reading a tabloid. It tackles on violence, murder, rape, incest, corruption, corporate crime, ethics, and some moral issues. I bought the idea “it was a sexy thriller”. I find out that there is no sexiness in it but it has a lot of disturbing scenes. If you are reading the book, you will be glad that you are seeing these scenes only though your imagination. If you are watching the movie, you will be glad that it is only happening on screen. If you are asking for romance, categorically speaking, there is none. But within my paradigm, there is. It is something you wish to happen even after you read the book.

 The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo stands out among other crime stories probably because of the plot’s complexity. It’s like there are two stories to follow, two crimes to understand. Its plot is cleverly done and satisfying as well.

In terms of writing style, I like how Steig Larsson for that. (Though you have to note that it was originally written in Swedish then was translated by Reg Keeland in English) You can tell Steig Larsson is a journalist by the way he wrote the novel. The sentence structures are simple. The descriptions are not very intricate but vivid enough to haunt you. The language is very accessible that a fifth grader can read the novel, given that the kid can grasp adult concepts. I like the way he chops the scenes in the book. Each section leaves you a conclusion which you later find out it is just a mere suspicion.

I read a review in Good Reads that the lead characters are not “likable.” Indeed, they are not likable but they have traits that you will want to have. Michael Blookmvist is very detail-oriented, very systematic. Salander is mentally incapacitated but her memory and analytical skills are above the average. Well, we always like intelligent characters.

What I also like about the book is that it deals with ethical and moral dilemmas. For instance, will you do what is proper with the risk of doing greater harm to a person who is in good faith? When I was reading the book, I was reminded by the Impeachment trial of Chief Justice Corona though it was entirely a different thing. I remember that one of prosecution lawyers said something like this “ if an evidence is obtained illegally, it doesn’t mean it cannot be used and that it is invalid. Thus, can it be said that the end justifies the means?  Blomkvist is a man of principle but as what one of the characters said, “You had to choose between your  role as a journalist and your role as a human being.”

While I took a pause from reading, I found a scratch in my elbow. I got it from Sweden while I was tracking a criminal with Lisbeth Salander and Mikael Blomkvist. After I read, I browsed the pages of Financial Times. I realized I took my free subscription for granted. I watched the movie. Now, I’m excited to read The Girl who Played with Fire.

Too bad the author died before his novels became phenomenal.

P.S. If by any chance, read the book before watching the movie. The movie is faithful to the book but the reading experience is much better.

Speech 121

07 Apr 2012 5 Comments

by JackieB in Features, Journal, Need to Know Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

One of the advantages studying in Diliman is the freedom to choose your subjects, schedule, and teachers.

As a shiftee, I did not grab the chance to avail such student’s “benefit” of choosing teachers. I just wanted to enroll all the prerequisite subjects I could get so that I could catch up with my batch mates.

One of the basic subjects of a Speechcomm student is Speech 121, Oral Interpretation. Ma’am Villy’s Speech 121 class was the only one that had slots and complemented well with my schedule. If my first impression was solely based on her name, she sounded like a flower. Water Lily? I gathered opinions from other students and found out that she was no flower at all. There were nice comments about her but the negative comments were more elaborate. She was one of the “terror” teachers. Some even described her as ”bitchy.” They said she gave low grades to students. For someone who had stage fright and who was often intimidated, like me, it was already a courageous act to be in her class.

Courageous Act 1 

She was known for being frank to her students. When I heard stories about her, I felt I was going to lose my self-esteem in her class. By her looks, you would judge her as someone snobbish. For a better word, she looked “regal” Sometimes, I had this illusion that she was always raising her eyebrows. Did she or was I imagining? She did not smile a lot. As what I believed, “It’s either you hate her or you love her.”

On our first day of class, when I told her I was living in KNL, she said, “So you’re living in the squatter area of UP?” Of course, it was a joke. But she delivered it well like a villain. She reprimanded me for using Wikipedia in my report (which I am very shameful to say up to this very day.) She did not let me finish a sentence with an unheard word ( words I mumbled due to poor vocabulary).

Courageous Act 2

Our first oral interpretation assignment was to deliver a poem. And of all the pieces in the world, I chose a Shakespeare sonnet. “Your piece is too short. You should have memorized it. The way you did in your introduction. You introduction was very good. ” I did not memorize my introduction. I prepared the introduction five minutes before the class whereas as I spent a day practicing 14 Shakespearean lines. Earlier in class, she said to underline the words in our pieces that needed stress. After my performance, she told me I used stress in almost all the words in the poem.

Courageous Act 3

“What would you if I told you I wanted to kill myself?”

As usual I had one of the best introductions but had one of the worst performances in class, (as usual). I delivered a part of a play about a daughter who wanted to kill herself and her mother wanted to stop her. She then gave her comments. “You were OA (overacting)”

Courageous Act 4

For our final performance, we made an interpretation of a play for children. I was one of the minor fairies in the play. I was Courage who had about five to eight lines in the play. My greatest line: “Good day Prince, I am Courage.” On our final rehearsal, she dropped Courage (me) as one who had the strongest voices. At last, she said something nice about my performance!

Courageous Act 5

After our performance ended, she noticed my voice. I don’t know if my memory is right. She said I had one of the outstanding voices referring to my volume and intensity? She noticed I wore a camouflage jumper to symbolize courage while the rest were wearing Sunday dresses. Then she continued: “Except your costume was off.” And for the very last, she said something negative about my performance.

By the end of our class, she ordered ice cream for us. We had our class photo. She smiled with me in the camera. She was not the woman I thought of when I was filling up my enrollment form. In contrary to what others believed, she was not a ‘ terror’ teacher. When I got to know more of her personality in class, I was not as scared to listen to her remarks as to listen to my classmates’ remarks. Her honesty was just right. She would tell you what you deserved to know. She would not throw praises to you for free. And she would not throw insults to you out of nowhere. Having said that, I was brave enough to take another subject with her but by fate and by computer system of enrollment, I never had the chance to take another subject, and I never will…

I may be one of her easy-to-forget students but I will never forget her. After all, Speech 121 is one of my favorite subjects. I discovered that I actually like to perform. If it weren’t my favorite, I would not have written all of this. One of my college professors said that a teacher finds fulfillment when a student can still remember a single lesson or a single thought from her class… Not a single lesson..Not a single thought …..but if it has to be a single thought, it is Courage.

Rest in peace, Prof. Villy Buenaventura. You are one of the best Speech teachers I’ve ever had. 

Why Dances with Wolves

04 Apr 2012 4 Comments

by JackieB in Arts and Entertainment, Film Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

There are a lot of reasons why you and I should include Dances with Wolves in our must-see movie list. My primary reason is Kevin Costner. And my personal reason is he is handsome, even today and even tomorrow. I have to remind myself that he is older than the eldest in my family. And his daughter is older than me. But his eyes make you melt. That’s what I call “actor’s eyes”.

Second and the primary reason for everybody else is that the movie won Oscars Best Picture in 1991. Not only that, they won Best Director, Best Adapted Screenplay, Best Cinematography, Best Film Editing. Best Sound, Best Original Score. I guess this fact alone is enough to build your curiosity.

Third, the lead actor is the director himself. Kevin Costner was nominated as Best Actor. It was the first movie he directed which gave him the award Best Director 

Fourth reason, it’s a product of first time. Aside from having a first-time director, it was based on the first novel of Michael Blake. Most of the cast members had never had acting experience in film before they starred in Dances with Wolves.(That’s inspiring for people who don’t want to try because of lack of experience)

Fifth reason, the length of the movie does not follow the convention of a typical movie. The movie takes three hours. Kevin Costner presented the story to a couple of producers but none of them agreed to make the film. He then ended up making his own film. Thus having said the length of the film, it has the tendency to be boring. It depends on your level of film viewing maturity. Length also means details.

Sixth reason, the film is very American but it gained more profit in Europe than in US. (You realize that sometimes the people near you are not necessarily your direct target market). This story is based on the early of times of America when white men were conquering the lands of Indians. 

Lastly, it’s about friendship. It is unthinkable to have a shared understanding of two cultures. For the language barrier, they rely on one woman to be their translator. It’s about cultural assimilation, to leave prejudice behind and build new relationship.

You’ll find other deeper reasons to watch the movie. And I’m leaving it all to Wikipedia or Rotten Tomatoes for your plot summary. For the artistry and the production aspects of the film, I’m leaving it all to more trusted film critics as I cannot give justice.

When I think of Whitney

03 Apr 2012 2 Comments

by JackieB in Arts and Entertainment, Features, music Tags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

I know it’s been a long time since Whitney died but I haven’t moved on. American Idol featured Whitney’s songs. That event highlighted the best singers in the show and revealed those who lacked versatility. As I watched video clips of American Idol, the more memories  of Whitney flooded in my brain.

I am not claiming I have been a die-hard fan because I never was. In fact, I don’t sing Whitney’s songs. But how can you not appreciate a great singer who set the bar for the music industry? Jed Madela, WCOPA champion said, “It’s hard to imagine the music industry without her.” Indeed, it is. If you want to impress people with your singing talent, pick Whitney’s song. If you want to win in a singing contest, pick Whitney’s song. If you want to be the next pop star, pick Whitney’s song. As for me, how can you not miss a voice who has been part of your consciousness? Even if she has not been active for a long time in the industry, you can still hear her voice. Even if I intentionally delete her in my memory, I can still hear her voice. Her voice is omnipresent.

If you ask me what Whitney’s songs I know,  my first response will not be The Greatest Love of All or I will always love you. Maybe if I had a significant history of joining singing contests, these songs would be probably on top of my list. The first son gs that cross my mind are When you believe,  My love is your love, I believe in you and me. She first released these songs when I started to watch MTV. This is the reason she is significant to me among all the famous people who died. When I think of MTV, I think of her. When I think of the first music videos I’ve watched, I think of her. I’m a 90s baby. I’m glad that I got to see her songs on the chart.

When you believe

When I think of this song, I believe. It is my version of Impossible Dream.  I had a copy ( cassette tape) of this song when I was a kid. At some point, I memorized this song by heart.

Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe….

They don’t always happen when you ask
And it’s easy to give in to your fear, ohh
But when you’re blinded by your pain
Can’t see your way safe through the rain
Thought of a still resilient voice
Says love is very near

I believe in you and me

Though only a few people know about this song, it’s one of my favorite Whitney’s songs. It sounds endearing and sweet and I like the music video. If ever I am going to copy a concept for my music video, I’ll choose this. It’s so magical to  sing in the woods with an orchestra accompanying you. Compared to her other songs, she sang it with minimal voice acrobatics. I heard two contestants of American Idol sing this song but none of them was able to give me that kind of feeling.. the kind of feeling that you are whispering on someone’s ear assuring that everything will be alright.

My love is your love

I like jamming with this song because of its reggae feel. Now, I like the song more because of its meaningful lyrics

 If I lose my fame and fortune

And I’m homeless on the street
And I’m sleeping in Grand Central Station
It’s okay if you’re sleeping with me

If I should die this very day
Don’t cry, ’cause on Earth we weren’t meant to stay
And no matter what the people say
I’ll be waiting for you after the judgment day

 

When I think of Whitney, I  think of  immortality.


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